Monthly Archives: August 2014

Legend

Photo Copyright – Madison Woods

“What is this stuff?” Mary asked.

Victor knelt before the multicolored goop flowing down the hillside. “It moves like lava.”

“That’s not lava.”

“It looks to be biological.” Victor examined a small sample on the end of a twig.

“It’s alive?” Sarah stepped backward.

“No, but I’d wager to guess that it’s from something that is.”

“The source would have to be massive.”

“Indeed.” Victor dropped the twig and backed away from the flowing puss. “Local lore tells of such a creature. I thought it was just a story, but if it’s true, we’ll never leave this place. Not alive.”

This tale was written for Friday Fictioneers. I’m not sure if he’s serious or just playing a cruel joke on her. I’ll leave that up to you to decide.

Also, in other news. If you sign up for my mailing list you’ll be entered to win a signed paperback of Sins of a Father (due out soon). The offer to get Zombie Tree (e-book edition) for free still applies as well. What are you waiting for? Go sign up already!


Movie of the Week: Critters (1986)

This week is a special week. Because yesterday was my birthday and I’m feeling generous I’m going to give you a triple feature this week: Critters, Critters 2, and Critters 3! All in one post!

You’re welcome. If you want to give me a birthday present, how’s about you join my mailing list? You’ll even get a free copy of Zombie Tree for doing so.

Critters

Critters 2

Critters 3


Single Mother

She stood on the crest of the hill; watched the children playing in the valley below near the long unused logging road. It’d been six years since she’d seen a truck traverse that old road; six years since John’s accident. It was mostly overgrown with weeds now, barely noticeable as a road at all.

Life without John-life as a single mother-was hard. All too often there wasn’t enough food to feed both children and herself so she’d go without.

With tears in her eyes she nudged the pile of precariously stacked boulders over the edge.

“Goodbye, my sweets.”


Tough Mudder? Yeah, I did that.

So I took a vacation last week, and it ended in spectacular style. I completed the Pittsburgh/Ohio Valley Tough Mudder, and it was awesome. I’m looking forward to doing another in the future.

If you’ve never heard of Tough Mudder you must be living under a rock. Basically, it’s a 10 to 12 mile mud covered obstacle course. And when I say mud covered, that’s an egregious understatement. There was so much mud that even the mud was covered with mud. Tough Mudder is not a race. There is no clock. How fast you finish doesn’t matter. That you finish and that you help others finish: that’s what matters. It’s about giving your all and making sure the person next to you does the same. That’s pretty much all you need to know. Here are some photos of the fun things I got to do. A good bit of the course wasn’t accessible to spectators so I only have photos of about half of the obstacles.

All clean and happy, just ready to get out on the course.

All clean and happy, just ready to get out on the course.

Hopping over the wall to get to the starting area.

Hopping over the wall to get to the starting area.

Kiss of Mud - Crawling through the mud under some barbed wire--always a good time.

Kiss of Mud - Crawling through the mud under some barbed wire-always a good time.

Glory Blades - Over some more walls--no big deal.

Glory Blades - Over some more walls-no big deal.

Walk the Plank - Arrr, matey!

Walk the Plank - Arrr, matey!

Prairie Dog - Muddy water with randomly dug holes to fall into. Yay!

Prairie Dog - Muddy water with randomly dug holes to fall into. Yay!

Arctic Enema - A dumpster full of ice water (literally--ice cubes were floating in the water) with a board in the middle you have to swim under. What's not to love?

Arctic Enema - A dumpster full of ice water (literally-ice cubes were floating in the water) with a board in the middle you have to swim under. What’s not to love?

Pyramid Scheme - Use people as a makeshift ladder to climb a slippery, muddy slope. Note: being part of the ladder hurts, sucks, and should be avoided at all costs. Trust me, I have firsthand knowledge.

Pyramid Scheme - Use people as a makeshift ladder to climb a slippery, muddy slope. Note: being part of the ladder hurts, sucks, and should be avoided at all costs. Trust me, I have firsthand knowledge.

Pole Dancer - Parallel bars that slope up then down. Cross using hands only. This was one of the easier obstacles on the course in my opinion, but still fun.

Pole Dancer - Parallel bars that slope up then down. Cross using hands only. This was one of the easier obstacles on the course in my opinion, but still fun.

Balls to the Wall - Another easy one. Use the rope to climb up the wall and down the other side--standard obstacle course fare. Add another 10 or 15 feet and this would be a badass obstacle.

Balls to the Wall - Another easy one. Use the rope to climb up the wall and down the other side-standard obstacle course fare. Add another 10 or 15 feet and this would be a badass obstacle.

Everest - I expected this one to be harder, but with good footing and a strong sprint it really wasn't all that difficult.

Everest - I expected this one to be harder, but with good footing and a strong sprint it really wasn’t all that difficult.

Electroshock Therapy - The sign before this one said "I know you're scared and this will sting like a motherf**ker, but it's safe. We promise." They weren't lying. That last shock almost knocked me flat on my face.

Electroshock Therapy - The sign before this one said “I know you’re scared and this will sting like a motherf**ker, but it’s safe. We promise.” They weren’t lying. That last shock almost knocked me flat on my face.

Not so clean anymore, but still happy. Already wanting to get back out there and punish myself some more.

Next time I’ll get an even longer course. They have a special extra bit for Legionnaires (repeat Mudders). I really wanted to do the Fire in your Hole obstacle (a waterslide with fire you go through at the bottom before it launches you into a pool of water), but I was a first timer so I didn’t get to. Next time though, that beast will be conquered. I can promise you that.

“The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It’s a very mean and nasty place, and I don’t care how tough you are. It will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit you as hard as life. But it ain’t about how hard you hit. It’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward; how much you can take and keep moving forward. That’s how winning is done. ” - Rocky Balboa


Movie of the Week: Trick Or Treat (1986)

As a Halloween (the holiday) lover and a fan of bad horror, I approve of this cheesy ass movie. Enjoy!


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